Golden Rule for a stable Marriage.

 

 The Golden rule for a stable  Marriage:

              LEAVE    AND  CLEAVE 





"For this reason, a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked, but they were not ashamed." Genesis 2:24‭-‬25

The Golden rule for a happy married life was given at the time when God conducted,  the first marriage.

LEAVE

  •  Leaving all soulish attachments from parents was taught in the book of Genesis.

That does not mean that we should not respect our Father and Mother (Eph 6:1 ). Honouring our parents is an important commandment before Marriage and even after Marriage.

It does not mean that we should not provide for our parents ( Mk 7: 9 - 12).

We can definitely take good counsel and advice from our parents and have a healthy relationship with them.

We can also accommodate the Parents with us if the need arises but we need to ensure that the umbilical cord is cut off.

  • Keep always this Order: for a healthy Relationship: God First then the Spouse then our parents. 

After Marriage   Our relationship with the spouse should now be more important to us next to our relationship with Christ. ( LK 14:26 )

  •  Leave: ( cut off ) all ties, in case you had any relationships, as a single. 
  •  Leave:. Any lustful passions that you have indulged in before marriage and live an overcoming life. (carry the cross )(LK 9:23) 
  • Leave ( Overcome ) Any attractions that you may be tempted by during your married life.

CLEAVE

 Cleave: If you have obeyed the first instructions ( of leaving ) the second will not be hard.

 The husband is instructed to Love His wife _as Christ loved the Church. ( His Love consists of being patient, kind, long-suffering, forgiving, not being rude, …1 cor 13: ) . 

He  also instructed Husbands to live a sacrificial life in order to be Christ Like (Eph 5:25)



 Biblical Instructions to: Wives

Be respectful, Be submissive. Let  not dressing be provocative. Let your modeling be not with the outward show but a good Character Glow


"In the same way, you wives, be subject to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won over without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your pure and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, wearing gold jewelry, or putting on apparel; but it should be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God."1 Peter 3:1‭-‬4


The New Testament also teaches about leaving and cleaving.

"The night is almost gone, and the day is near. Therefore let’s rid ourselves ( put off / leave ) of the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light". (Romans 13:12 )


Leave 

What deeds of darkness are Paul asking the people of God to leave? We read that in verse Rom 13:13

  •   partying and getting drunk,
  •  sexual immorality ( the main reason for broken Homes )
  • other excesses, (perversity/pornography)
  •  quarreling and being jealous.
  • Put off the lying habit. ( Eph 4:25)
Before being born again, this was a normal way that we lived. Most of us indulged in some of the above sins. ( Col 3: 7,8. 1 pet 4:3 ).


Cleave
What are we exhorted to cleave ( put on ) in the New Testament?
"But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh regarding its lusts."
( Rom 13: 14)
Oftentimes, Paul would remind the brethren about 
God's purpose in choosing us is to make us like Jesus.( Rom 8:28,29, Eph 4:24, Col 2:6 also in 1 John 2:6)

Taking Heed to the word of God can alone brings Happiness. Remember Adam and Eve lived happily as long as they heeded God's word.




Many Divorces could have been avoided if we had called a spade a spade.

"So then, if while her husband is alive she gives herself to another man,  she will be called an adulteress............... "   ( Romans 7:3)


Cleaving does involve cleaving.
Paul gives an obvious instruction to the couple regarding having intimate relationships with their spouses.  In fact, Paul said, the couple needs to take this seriously to avoid immorality in their married life.

"But because of sexual immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise the wife also to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does, and likewise, the husband also does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control." 1 Corinthians 7:2‭-‬5 NASB2020